Studio Re-Opening Announcement | North Bay & Callander Photographer
Anyone who actually reads my posts is about to be saying “What!? Steph, make up your MIND already!” and I’ll be over here nodding along with you, because you’re right. I’ve flip flopped and just about committed business suicide for the last year or more, and it’s been an annoying, nauseating ride.
I’m about to get real & vulnerable, so bear with me. When I moved North, I couldn’t WAIT for my studio to be built so that I could begin to rebuild my business. I was so excited when it was completed in February, 2020 – I couldn’t wait to open my doors to meet all kinds of new people who might become part of my new client base. When the world flipped upside down in March, 2020, and made that impossible, I entered a downward spiral that I didn’t even recognize for a long time.
Not being allowed to work, I felt like I lost my identity. By the time the roller coaster had been going on for nearly two years, I’d completely forgotten who I was, what I loved, what made me happy; and had no bloody clue what I wanted to do with my life. I kept trying to fall in love with my job again – photography has always been one of the biggest loves of my life, but I just couldn’t find the passion. By January of this year, I had decided that I was going to close my business for good. Give it up forever. Walk away from everything that I’ve worked so hard for over the past decade. I cleared my calendar, turned away bookings, retreated inward in a way that I’ve never done before. It did not feel good.
Finally, one day this Winter, after suffering far too long, I picked up the phone and called my doctor. I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, and was prescribed meds and CBT. I felt like a failure. I felt ridiculous that I needed to ask for help from someone else. I especially hated the idea of antidepressants. Part of me is embarrassed to admit all of this, but another part knows that if this story can help even ONE other person to recognize this in themselves and seek out the help they need, then putting myself out there is worth it. My doctor tells me that mental health struggles are on the rise in an incredible way these days, and there is no shame in asking for help.
Looking back now that I’m feeling better, I can’t believe I thought that asking for help meant that I’d failed myself somehow. I can’t believe that I spent so long spiraling downwards that I just about threw everything away. This week, I stood in my studio, which I’ve recently announced that I was closing and felt my passion creeping back in, renewed like fire, like I haven’t felt in a long time. I have all kinds of new ideas that I can’t wait to try, and more than anything I feel EXCITED about the idea of REOPENING MY STUDIO DOORS again, and that feels pretty damn good. 🙂
If you’ve read this far, thank you! Thank you for your continued support, love, and understanding. If you’ve been following me on this roller coaster, I cannot thank you enough for always having my back even when my decisions didn’t make a lot of sense. The Studio will be reopening in May, and I will FINALLY be able to release those Grand Opening Specials that I never had the opportunity to launch two years ago!
Stay with me peeps, this is going to be good!
Much love,
Stephanie
Muah!
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